The younger you are, the more careless you tend to be. And that’s how it’s supposed to be. But passing time inevitably makes you take care of yourself, your mental wellbeing, and your background more. From reflecting on people you spend time with to adding some little rituals to your lifestyle, like drinking more water or putting on face cream daily, there are many ways to self-improve.
So when one Redditor posed a question to older women on the “Ask Women” subreddit, “What are some underrated ways to take care of ourselves now to make things easier when we get older?” it delivered some incredible advice. So take your notes out, below are some of the most useful pieces of advice to start with today to make time and age stand on your side.
This post may include affiliate links.
Keep making friends and fostering friendships. My former boss (retired now, in her 60s) has a group of girlfriends. They vacation together, go golfing, shopping, dining etc. I commended her on this and she explained that her husband is a lot older than her and she was aware that he would likely pass away before her,and she didn't want to be alone. Most of her friends are married but they have prioritized their friendship for decades.
This is so important. I have friendships that I have maintained and I'm very glad I did or I would be lonely as hell. Even though they live in other countries or far away, it's nice to know there's a friend out there who's got your back and loves you no matter what. I count myself lucky to have such friends.
“The experience of aging can feel very different for men and women,” Dr. Lise Deguire, a clinical psychologist and author of the award-winning book “Flashback Girl: Lessons on Resilience From a Burn Survivor,” told Bored Panda.
“Women still are highly valued for their looks and appearance, both by society and in women's own self-appraisals. Often, young women gain social status just by being pretty. So aging, which gradually involves loss of youthful beauty, gray hairs, and stretch marks, can feel like more of a loss to a woman,” Lise explained. “Men, in contrast, are typically more highly valued for their earning power and status. Men may miss their youthful looks, but generally this loss does not affect their social status the way it can for women.”
You know who thinks you look great? You, ten years from now. Embrace and enjoy the body you have right here, right now. Focus on all the things it can do, and all the parts that work well and don’t hurt. This body you’re maybe way too critical of now will likely be a body you’ll think of fondly in the future so you may as well treat it fondly now.
When I look at pictures of younger me, I wish I had felt as beautiful as I was then!
I’m 48 and my biggest thing right now is getting rid of stuff. We have so much cr*p and I don’t want my kids to get stuck cleaning it all out at some point, hopefully in the very far future. It’s a normal amount of stuff, but my dad had barely any “stuff” and it still took weeks to go through.
OMG yes!! Still trying to get my mom to get rid of stuff. My sister in law has worked with her for several years and she has donated carloads of toys, books, clothing etc and the house still seems bursting. I gotta say having had to clean out a house after my friend died makes me purge a lot from my own life.
Wear earplugs in loud areas. Have earplugs handy for unexpected loud situations. If you find yourself in a loud situation with no earplugs then do your best to get away. There are even earplugs designed to allow some sound through so you can still hear important things.
I have better hearing than a lot of people around my age. It's awesome. Conversations will be a lot less frustrating for you in the future if you plug your ears.
When asked about common misconceptions about women getting old, Lise said that surprisingly, aging can be a relief. “I find that many of my older female clients eventually enjoy some hidden benefits to aging. Women past menopause often feel liberated from societal pressures to act or look a certain way to attract men. Women who have held back on their opinions, for fear of seeming less attractive, sometimes now feel freer to state what they actually think.” The clinical psychologist also added that “a lot of women also enjoy not having to dress to attract men, and enjoy wearing what they truly feel like wearing.”
Preventative care. Go to the gyno, doctor, and dentist regularly. Get those Pap smears, mammograms, cleanings, etc. If you can get a skin cancer check every couple of years - do it.
Sunscreen! And stay out of the sun.
Take care of your skin. Can’t tell you how many posts I see from people who say they never took care of their skin and now at 50 are looking for a magic potion.
Same with your teeth.
Wear shoes that aren’t ruining your feet, knees, and back.
If you need medication and can afford it - take it. It’s easy to let things go, but your arteries, organs, brain, etc. will thank you.
Regular drinking is bad for your health and appearance. If you aren’t a regular drinker - don’t start. If you are, cut back.
Nuture your old friendships. The older you get, the more precious it becomes to have friends who knew you in different stages of your life.
I think what you're never prepared for is how much friendships break and fade away after uni. Everyone is married or taken up with life that you don't talk anymore. I talk to probably just one or two persons regularly.
Not just exercise, but build your physical balance. This will be a literal life saver as you age.
There are many ways to approach aging gracefully, so women can feel stronger, better and happier as time passes. Lise’s advice is to invest in your health, relationships, and well-being instead of your appearance. “Aging is unavoidable and fighting it is a losing battle. Instead, focus on staying active, calling friends, and giving back to others. With your age, you have probably learned wisdom and compassion, which are ultimately more valuable than a perfect figure,” she explained and added that it’s better to “focus on how much you can give back to others instead of how many wrinkles you have, and you will probably feel much more satisfied in life.”
Don't wait to make memories. Do it now. Go out with that friend. Go away for that weekend. Go to that concert. Watch that play. Call that friend. Hug your mum, dad, children, dog, cat, whatever.
Do it now. Don't regret what you have done because you might regret what you haven't.
Keep going out atleast once a week even if it’s to sit at the coffee shop by yourself.
It sounds simple right??? But for a ton of us it’s really scary. Some of us hate the thought of others looking at us and judging us. Starting in 2019 I quit going out and would be afraid of people simply focusing on my nose, my scars, my makeup etc instead of my eyes.
Well I’m now just starting to go out. It’s really hard but I’m getting the hang of it. I should have kept going out and having fun often, instead of hiding away because I got too used to it and then afraid to go out. I’m only 28 !!!!!!
Edit your life. A couple years ago, after being upset when two different friends posted yet another unsettling untrue thing on Facebook regarding vaccines, and social justice, I realized I just don’t want to be a fact checker for my friends. I also quit Facebook. I used to challenge myself to have friends who didn’t share all my political and social views but the last six years have made that challenge way too challenging, the divide cannot be bridged. Also edit old beliefs, like spiritual or religious beliefs that cause unwarranted guilt or fear or encourage narrow mindedness. Edit your possessions so you don’t have to spend so much time on stuff and so your loved ones don’t have so much stuff to deal with after you’re no longer able to manage, or are dead. Edit your money habits so that you have more stashed away and so things like on line shopping or giving money to adult kids doesn’t put a strain on your future by draining your current budget. Edit your wardrobe to keep only things you can comfortably wear and that you find appealing. While doing so let go of judging others appearances, you’ll be surprised by how much energy it frees up and how much more accepting you’ll be of your own appearance.
I quit Facebook years ago because I got tired of seeing people's drama (petty or not), cringey posts, and conspiracy theory posts. Limiting my social media activity to a bare minimum has taken away some stress and annnoyance out of my life.
If you don’t have the energy to do a full workout, do the bare minimum to get your blood moving, whether it’s walking or doing a quick squat-push up-sit up cycle
Look around your house. Especially if you are a home owner. I have a ten year plan to make my home handicap friendly before I retire. I want even floors, friendly to wheelchairs. Showers without a lip to trip over. My water heater is in the spider dungeon, I plan to move it upstairs. The siding needs repaired and the roof replaced before I am on a fixed income. Correct the drains so I don't have to blow them out every 6 months, put in sprinklers so I don't have to move hoses. And the big one, wish list more than to do list, get solar panels.
Learn absolutely everything you can about perimenopause and menopause. We don't talk about it enough or adequately share lived experience. It all starts far earlier than most women realize and hot flashes are the very least of it. We are woefully unprepared for this process.
Also have your own money and save diligently, even if you think you can't afford to.
Menopause hit me at 49. I’m 61 now, and supposedly post-menopause, but it often doesn’t feel like it. Additionally, I am convinced the hormonal upheaval and resulting stress of menopause epigenetically triggered a couple medical conditions I evidently had dormant DNA for. I never had any symptoms of those conditions in the decades prior, yet suddenly they were presenting themselves. They’re absolutely not conditions that are age- or gender-related, nor are they caused by outside factors like lifestyle, but they do have a DNA link. Not sure if any research has been done specifically linking menopause to epigenetic changes. It would be worth looking into more deeply.
I’m a nurse in aged care. Don’t smoke, eat healthily, don’t lead a sedentary lifestyle, nurture healthy family relationships and for crying out loud have a will and make your wishes legally binding if/when you can’t advocate for yourself. If we are lucky to grow old and have mistreated our bodies or have estranged/step families, it is a f*cking nightmare for those looking after you if you didn’t have your sh*t together when you had your faculties.
I need to do that will thing, since I'm single and I want my chosen family to get my stuff, not my siblings.
Keeping a clean and organized space makes me feel so much calmer. I never understood what my mom meant by this when I was a teen but I get it now.
When my "outside world" is in order, my "inside world" is in order. Clutter and disorganization actually have an emotional effect on me. I discovered this personal truth, after many years of wondering about the reason that I felt upheaval, when my surroundings were out of order.
Live intentionally. Lots of people shuffle through the daily stressful things almost on automatic. Reduce time wandering in tv shows and increase time asking questions and figuring out your needs - meditating, eating better, creating a budget instead of just guesstimating month to month. Deciding about your own personal ethics and values, establishing boundaries, and working on your mental health are all incredibly important. Challenge your beliefs and assumptions that you picked up from your parents.
My friend and I were just talking about this. We are both nature nerds and would rather be outside than in. When we first met, she had no tv, I had one. Since then, I have gotten rid of my tv, and she got one. She talked about sometimes she just needs some mindless entertainment to wind down, nothing wrong with that in my book. Holding yourself to someone else’s standards, trying to ALWAYS be mindful and have a sense of purpose can ruin a persons mental health. Just be you, be the best you, do what you need to help you be you…best or not
Flossing -isn't underrated but I didn't realize receding gums were a thing until my dentist told me they do testing on your gums after a certain age. And that can cause all kinds of problems. Take care of your teeth!
Don't believe everything you see or hear. The longer I live, the more I recognize the hyperbole and promises all over tv, radio and internet as just noise to tune out. Reserve judgment and avoid hysteria. It helps your mental health immensely to screen out noise and test assumptions rather than jumping on bandwagons.
Take care of your joints, and work on your mobility and balance. It doesn't need to be a special workout, but doing yoga regularly, being barefoot as much as possible (to combat bunions and improve proprioception), and doing some gentle exercise like walking or swimming.
Falling and breaking a bone can be fatal when you get older.
I failed this one; written as I wait here for a checkup on my broken foot.
Exercise. It's easier to get in shape when you're younger and then hold onto that rather than try to get better strength/endurance at a later time.
My dad used to say that to me all the time, and I was like... Whatever. But then I finally started working out regularly when I was 28 and in the years since it's been easy to keep up a decent fitness level with much less effort.
One of my friends never exercised either because she thought of it as only something you do to become thinner and she was naturally very thin. Now we're in our late 30s and she struggles to stand on public transit or walk for an hour without a break. I only go to the gym about an hour a week these days but on vacation I can walk for hours without stopping
Be kind to yourself and your changing body. I look back about the years I hated myself and now I think about how kind I am to by body now and all the things it has allowed me to do.
Face lotion. I don't have a 6 step skin care routine but I moisturize all the time. Makes me feel better.
Buy and wear comfy shoes.
Listen to your body. Pushing yourself to extremes does you no favors later. Rest when you need.
I read a book called ‘Phosphorescence’ which talks about finding something that brings you joy, that you can immerse yourself in and escape to, particularly when life gets really tough. For me that has been diving. It’s taken me to such places of wonder and led me to both new friendships and remarkable adventures. I’ve dived with great whites and leafy sea dragons, manta rays, cuttlefish and octopi, frolicked with endangered sea lions and floated with dwarf minke whales. I only wish everyone with time on their hands could find their own phosphorescence.
I’m 60 next month and got my advanced diving certification in 2020 after only diving a handful of times since getting my open water when I was 55. I’ve now done close to 100 dives and been on multiple live-aboard dive expeditions and have many more planned all over the world. I also plan to keep learning and developing my diving skills and knowledge of the underwater world.
Buy the damn concert tickets - no regrets. Even if you go alone, at least you can say you went!
Exactly. If you want to do something, do it. If not you will regret it for the rest of your life. And....life is too short to make pastry. Buy it in the supermarket.
Sun protection, not only to look more youthful but as skin cancer prevention. A wide-brimmed summer hat, sunglasses and a full-sleeve rashguard are my go-tos when I'm at the beach. I might look a little nerdy but it beats getting sunburnt and having a dozen new moles pop up on my back.
Lift weights. Putting on muscle is like savings in the bank.... Make deposits now because one day it will only be withdrawals.
Building muscle is still achievable at an older age but itll hurt! So do it now. Where you can tell the difference between the burn and a strain. Itll also prevent having to go to pt if you do it right. So really do your research and start simple like yoga and palates
Getting enough sleep and sleeping at a regular time. I sleep a lot better if I'm consistent with the time I go to bed and I find I'm less tired if my sleep is regular versus getting up at various times.
One change that I made that was sooo hard at first but makes me feel so much better now, no more snooze on the alarm. It goes off, I get up. I'm less sleepy throughout the day. I still have to take meds for my sleep disorder, but between this and keeping a relatively consistent sleep schedule has improved my life so much
I started eating a Cbd gummy before bedtime, and I haven’t slept so well in years. So glad I found out about them!
Mazer needs a source for the "10% don't have CBD receptors". I found no such statistic. THC and CBD attach to the same receptors; THC can put you to sleep. Too much CBD is less problematic than too much THC. Most "street" weed comes from big growers, is not laced with any nasty illicit drugs (PCP is passé, and government doesn't do paraquat anymore). If "every" drug caused abberrant behavior, pharmaceutical companies would be out of business.
- Sunblock;
- Dental hygiene, which includes daily floss and mouthwash;
- Drinking water regularly; and
- Getting enough sleep.
Regular stretching and going to a physiotherapist to help with my back and shoulder pain. I have so much more pain now from sitting at a desk all day that I have to be proactive and do those stretches and get massages or physio so I don't become totally incapacitated from a sore back.
Don't assume lower back pain is age related. No amount of massages or yoga or pilates can fix ovarian cancer. I found this out the hard way.
MOISTURIZE everyday head to toe no matter how yucky it feels. Your old hormoneless skin will reward you!
Lifelesson #1: start putting yourself first more often, and if it's not you but someone else that comes first, make sure you do so out of conscious choice and not obligation.
Someone needs to get that Mazer person some friends, medication and/or therapy. I have never seen a more miserable pessimistic person and that's a lot coming from me!
LOVE LOVE LOVE the harsh judgements, Do you think you’re helping the situation by making the statement that you did because if that’s the case you’re the one who needs therapy. Instead of pointing your finger at me and saying I’m a miserable pessimistic person maybe you want to ask some questions about why I write what I write. That’s OK I’ve been harshly judged before.
Load More Replies...Lifelesson #1: start putting yourself first more often, and if it's not you but someone else that comes first, make sure you do so out of conscious choice and not obligation.
Someone needs to get that Mazer person some friends, medication and/or therapy. I have never seen a more miserable pessimistic person and that's a lot coming from me!
LOVE LOVE LOVE the harsh judgements, Do you think you’re helping the situation by making the statement that you did because if that’s the case you’re the one who needs therapy. Instead of pointing your finger at me and saying I’m a miserable pessimistic person maybe you want to ask some questions about why I write what I write. That’s OK I’ve been harshly judged before.
Load More Replies...